I have words today, lots of them. But I have even more emotions that I can’t seem to sort through. The news of Josh Duggar and his crimes against young girls have my heart breaking and my head in a dark place today and I’m struggling to make sense of it all.
You see, I was molested by a teenage boy when I was a young girl. This is a part of my story I’ve never told here. It’s never seemed appropriate or relevant or something I could put words to anyway, so I didn’t share. I’ve shared openly in other forums, just never here.
And so this story strikes close to home for me and my family and I feel ill, physically ill, and my heart absolutely breaks for the whole Duggar family.
I’ll admit, I’ve not read the police report, and I’ve only read a couple of the news reports. I really don’t want or need to know details and I’m protecting my own mind from going places it doesn’t need to go in light of my own background. But, from what I’ve read, it seems that Josh confessed what he did, repented, it was dealt with with the proper authorities, and the family has tried to heal and move on from unspeakable tragedy and shame happening under their own roof. Even before this all went public, the Duggar family was sentenced to carrying this shame forever, secretly or publicly. They could never forget. JimBob and Michelle cannot and will not ever probably forgive themselves for what happened under their own roof, under their watch. Josh will forever live with the guilt and shame of what he did to those girls. And those girls, they are forever scarred and will carry the shame of a sin they did not commit for the rest of their lives.
But now it’s all public. Very public. The whole world knew them already but now the world knows more than it ever should have. Not only were these girls robbed of their dignity by someone they should have been able to trust to protect them, now they’ve lost the veil of secrecy that they had from the world. This was their story to tell and that has been stolen from them too.
And when we hash this out on social media and berate Josh Duggar and/or his parents or the faith they grew up in, we abuse these girls all over again, but publicly now. Their dignity, their shame, is the price of admission for the world to express their hatred for the Duggar family. And it needs to stop. Those girls, Josh’s family, JimBob and Michelle, they all need time and space and grace to heal.
Sometimes I love social media, but it’s times like this I hate it. We do not sit in the judgment seat – either temporally or eternally. So let’s choose grace upon grace and even more grace. Because we are all broken, we are all sinners, and though your sin may not seem as big as someone else’s, we’re all filled with darkness and desperately in need of light and grace and hope. Let’s show some today.
For His Glory ~