When Joy is Found in the Dirt

Home a week now and half my heart, it stays in Haiti.  Those kids, their joy, it’s infectious and it gets into your blood and you never want to be cured of it all.

Two weeks ago in Haiti was wonderful and hard and beautiful.  Where a shy, pensive girl was led to me in February a joy-filled, excited child awaited me when the truck pulled in, her arms lifted high, saying “Mami!”.  Her smile, caught by a friend on camera, revealed pure joy, satisfaction that her “white mama” had finally come to see her again.  All week she followed me, held my hand, touched me, leaned in hard on me, slept with me, ate with me, worked with me.  Her happiness to simply be near me was humbling and beautiful.

Our little team worked hard on finishing the nursery, just built of concrete.  We sanded and painted and painted and painted some more.  We worked in close quarters and laughed and shared stories and made new friends.  And my dear friend and I, we left early, our families and our responsibilities needing us stateside sooner and she and I talked long of orphans and help and hope.  Now our families, long-time friends but long separated by so many countless miles, are rejoined in heart by this new shared love.

I come home, not exhausted this time, but filled with joy and anticipation of where God is going to take us next.  Once again I fall asleep and wake up to the image of beautiful, brown-skinned faces in my mind and I wonder when I can get back there, when can we get our girls there, and how can we better serve these people.  I give thanks for my family and for this life we have here and for allowing us to be a part of this wonderful thing He’s doing in a tiny land off the coast of Florida.

As we start a new week, my heart overflows at the goodness of God.  The trials and fiery arrows endured leading up to our trip, they all seem so small compared to the joy of being with those kids.   And my heart, it overflows at His faithfulness, mercy, and grace.

1846.  robin on the fence

1847.  sky torn open, rain pouring down

1848. playing stuffed animals with the littlest at home

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1849.  feeling hope, choosing hope

1850.  seeing places we need to simplify life

1851.   national donut day

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1852.  reconnecting

1853.  a good Sunday

1854.  one more day until I see our littlest girl

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1855.  exploring NYC at night on foot

1856.  time with an old friend

1857.  sweet littlest one so excited to see me

1858.  her joy, her smile

1859.  the Haiti trip I was longing for

1860.  pink paint

1861.  sanding concrete

1862.  loving these kids

1863.  her obedience when she really didn’t want to

1864.  asking to sleep with me

1865.  this glorious time with her

1866.  this Haiti trip

1867.  US soil

1868.  a bench to sleep on in O’Hare airport

1869.  reuniting with my favorite people

1870.  an evening with friends – those rare friends you can go a year without talking to and pick up like it was yesterday

1871.  sleeping in for everyone

1872.  first pool day of the season

1873.  thirty sponsorships in six hours

1874.  seeking His plan for each day

1875.  deep cleaning

1876.  a nap on the front porch

1877.  morning snuggles from the third born

1878.  sleeping until 9

1879.  second floor well-cleaned with the girls’ help

1880. waking up  to youngest two singing, playing Monopoly

1881.  cool sheets

1882.  oscillating fan

1883.  primer for the bathroom

1884.  a beautiful couple

1885.  a lovely wedding

1886.  words not meant to be funny, but they make us roll anyway

1887.  my dad

1888. his dad

1889.  the father of our girls who…

1890.  provides through his hard work

1891.  reminds me to laugh

1892.  is taking time to build relationships

1893.  loves His Lord

1894.  a perfect heavenly Father who fills in our gaps

 

“I will recount the steadfast love of the Lord, the praises of the Lord, according to all that the Lord has granted us.” ~ Isaiah 63:7a

 

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

Choosing Hope

I implore you to not give in to despair.  It is a dangerous temptation, because our Adversary has refined it to the point that it is quite subtle.  Hopelessness constricts and withers the heart, rendering it unable to sense God’s blessings and grace.  It also causes you to exaggerate the adversities of life and makes your burdens seem too heavy for you to bear.  Yet God’s plans for you, and His ways of bringing about His plans are infinitely wise.

Streams, June 1

Romans 5 says, “We also have joy with our troubles, because we know that these troubles produce patience. And patience produces character, and character produces hopeAnd this hope will never disappoint us, because God has poured out his love to fill our hearts. He gave us his love through the Holy Spirit, whom God has given to us.” (NCV)

The past nine months have been riddled with trials.  Trials common to life but trials just the same.  I have not been patient.  I have not developed character.  I have bucked against and resisted every single one.  And I have lost hope.

But today I choose hope.  I choose to yield and listen and trust.  Trials will continue to come and the flaming arrows of the Enemy will continue to fly.  But I will hope in the salvation of the Lord.  I will hope in His steadfast love.  I will hope in the victory that has been promised.

Because this hope will never disappoint.  My children will disappoint.  My husband will disappoint.  Life will disappoint.  I will disappoint.  But this hope will never disappoint because it is founded on the Rock, a firm foundation, One that will never move or change or let me down.  He is unshakeable, unfailing, an anchor for the soul.

We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. 

~ Hebrews 6:19

 

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

The List is Long…But He Keeps Giving More

Needing to be reminded of God’s faithfulness, I spend this afternoon typing out the gifts listed by hand.  The list is long as it has been too long since I sang His praises publicly.  Pictures from the past month are interspersed to make the post more interesting.  🙂

1741.  lovely Monday

1742.  humility that comes with feeling dumb

1743.  a clean first floor after dinner – gift from my girls

1744.  early morning walk

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1745.  working around the house

1746.  a cheerful Ellie

1747.  last day of formal school

1748.  painting in the sun

1749.  meeting neighbor ladies

1750.  bunk beds painted

1751.  bathroom progress

1752.  backyard sitting in the spring

1753.  joy of the dog with her soccer ball

1754.  joy of children on a trampoline

1755.  dinner with friends

1756.  good conversation

1757.  beds sanded and assembled

1758.  yard clean(er)

1759.  time together

1760.  watching the girls work together to organize and clean

1761.  a lovely day at Deanna Rose

1762.  rains parting, stopping

1763.  just being present

1764.  finally feeling like running again

1765.  bread baking

1766.  weekday lunch with my beloved

1767.  leisurely Saturday

1768.  chatting with the neighbor

1769.  bike rides

1770. sick kids on a Sunday morning

1771.  changing plans

1772.  quiet with my Lord on the front porch

1773.  little ballerinas

1774.  an art show

1775.  towering treees

1776.  squirrels that chase

1777.  Phad Thai “delivered”

1778.  working together

1779.  a perfect night to walk, laugh, run

1780.  a picnic outside

1781.  chalk drawings

1782.  spray paint

1783.  early morning fox on the run

1784.  garage saling fun

1785.  good advice from a friend

1786.  second-to-last week of Thursday night madness

1787.  picnic with friends

1788.  date night happiness

1789.  really good sleep

1790.  girls’ room coming together

1791.  fruit of our labor

1792.  beautiful day to walk

1793.  giant cotton candy

1794.  shattered bottle of nailpolish

1795.  pink grout, tile, trim

1796.  adding to my summer to do list

1797.  mothers of all kinds

1798.  grocery shopping, dollars stretching

1799.  five miles of hills run

1800.  no more cast

1801.  days that break

1802.  little break throughs

1803.  a quiet place to write, think

1804.  three children who need so much prayer

1805.  a house set on fire

1806.  knowing God can bring good, even from these things

1807.  a morning out with the girls

1808.  the courage to speak

1809.  the last “Thursday night madness”

1810.  goals accomplished

1811.  questions raised

1812.  praying for answers

1813.  painted furniture

1814.  husband’s help

1815.  ballet recital

1816.  a long year finished

1817.  a slow Monday morning

1818.  lists being made

1819.  two weeks til Haiti

1820.  fun newborn session

1821.  family who works while I am gone

1822.  back yard forts and shipwrecks

1823.  the power of a good story

1824.  learning to smile

1825.  sleeping in

1826.  a squabble-free day

1827.  a room finished

1828.  a morning nature hike

1829.  clearance rack flowers

1830.  free dresser

1831.  another broken arm

1832.  wondering what God is doing

1833.  learning and “remaining under”

1834.  yard looking so much better

1835.  late night tears and heartfelt conversations

1836.  photos edited, beautiful family

1837.  shopping lists made

1838.  time with friends

1839.  losing at every hand of cards

1840.  a doctor’s appointment

1841.  a leaky ceiling

1842.  my mama

1843.  one office visit

1844.  a short cast

1845.  three weeks to healing

My circumstances do not diminish God’s faithfulness.  My thanksgiving does not increase His  blessing.  But my gratefulness opens my eyes to His faithfulness, even in the valley of life.  As we walk the roads common to man, often filled with trials and tribulations, a heart of thankfulness is a heart that is open to the good that God is up to in the midst of a life that rubs hard against the soul.

May your heart be filled with thanks and your eyes be opened in hope to the goodness of a God who loves you wildy, madly, endlessly.

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

A Little Adoption Nesting = A Bedroom Makeover

Y’all, I am so excited about this post tonight – mostly because it means I’m finished with this project!  I have been working all of May to redo Chandler and Ellie’s (and eventually Amania’s) room.  We have struggled long to find something workable for these two.  The room is massive and the girls are both packrats/clutterbugs and so it was in constant disarray.  After praying about it and thinking it through, I came to believe that the mess was due to two factors:  1. Too much stuff (obvious), and 2. Not enough useable storage (not as obvious).

After Christmas we began the slow process of working on problem number 1.  Everything that wasn’t absolutely necessary was boxed up and taken out.  I didn’t have the time or energy for several weeks to mess with it, so the boxes just sat in our guest room.  Once I finally mustered up the courage to tackle that project (thank you 40 Bags), it went really well.  Ellie had apparently built enough emotional distance between herself and most of the items that we threw or gave away at least two thirds of what she wouldn’t have dreamed of parting with two months prior.  Amazing what a little time will do to our “attachments”.  About that same time, Matt added some lower clothing rods and more shelves to their closets, making them much better suited for people under 4 feet tall.

Then came the fun part – fixing problem number 2….

This month I have painted a twin bed, a bunk bed, a dresser, a bedside table, probably a dozen frames, a spice rack, and a large table and chairs.  I have had so.much.fun.  🙂  So come along as I walk you through their “new” room….

First, here is their room “before”.  In these photos it was staged for a neighborhood holiday open house, so it was in pristine condition.  Sadly, it rarely looked like this….

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Now, here’s their room after some adjustments and changes (and don’t miss all the little ways God provided for this room!)…

{Chandler’s bed with corkboards covered in burlap I found in our garage.  The bed is part of a discarded bunk bed a friend told me about and I got for free and painted.}

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{Ellie and Amania’s beds, also with the corkboard covered in burlap.  Obviously, we still need a real mattress and some bedding, but that’s not a top priority at this point.  The bunk beds were purchased off of Facebook for a fair price and then painted.}

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{Dresser purchased for $5 off of Facebook and painted. All of the art in the room is the girls’ own art.  I purchased (or had a friend purchase) cheap frames for me and then I spray painted them fun colors.}

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{New book case, a definite need in the room.  Baskets were from way back when we had a nursery and I spray painted them.  I ❤ spray paint.}

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{Stuffed animal storage – hanging planters purchased at Aldi for $6.00 each.  The rocking chair is the only piece of furniture in the room that did not get painted (except the book case which was purchased black).  I realized that at the end of the redo and just couldn’t force myself to take it on.}

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{One of my favorite parts of the room.  A Pinterest idea that I made my own – an open frame with Kansas tallgrass reeds glued in to hold the necklaces.  So lovely, in my humble opinon.}

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{This truly is my favorite part of the room and a really great story.  The girls used to have desks, but they were a maintenance issue, so they were pulled, but I wanted them to have a flat surface to work at if they wanted to color or something….}

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{So, I prayed and asked the Lord for a table.  I told Him I wanted a sturdy, round, wooden table, pedestal base.  Chairs would be nice, but I didn’t have to have them.  And I wasn’t terribly worried about the condition, as I was going to paint it.  Oh, and, I wanted it for $30 or less…}

{Within 24 hours of praying that, I got on Craig’s List and the first ad that popped up was for a solid wood dining table, round, with a pedestal base.  It came with four chairs and two leaves, giving it the ability to extend to up to six feet.  Oh, and it was $30. Even better, Matt actually had time that day to go pick it up for me, as there would have been no way for me to haul that in my SUV, let alone get it loaded.  }

{This still thrills me how God answered my little request for a table for my girls’ room.  He is so sweet to us!  Matt did the paint finish on it and I absolutely love it.  I am thankful to have it for the girls’ room, but I secretly wish I could put it somewhere more prominent because I like it so much!}

{We also made some updates to their bathroom.  We hung some of their art in there….}Photo & Video Sharing by SmugMug

{Also, I purchased and spray painted a spice rack to hold all of Chandler’s nail polishes.  (She LOVES to paint nails.)  We also took an extra table that had been in the bedroom and moved it to the bathroom.  It’s not perfect, but it provides a little more storage for towels and such.}

{Lastly, my SIL posted on Pinterest this little headband holder idea.  I’ve tried countless ways to keep headbands organized and this really seems to work!  Best of all, it only took me about 45 minutes to make both of the ribbon holders.}

The only thing still missing is shelves for the bunk beds.  We have a bit of a disagreement going about those as my beloved thinks the ones I have are ugly and I say they’re paid for and they match. I would install them myself, but they require using the drill – which I don’t know how to use, so I’m at the mercy of my handy husband.  Maybe the long weekend will bring him around.

That’s what I’ve been up to this month.  As I was painting the chairs for the table, sweating in the hot sun last Saturday, pushing ahead because I just desperately wanted to be finished, sweet Chandler was out there keeping me company and she said, “Mama, thank you for spending all your time trying to make my and Ellie’s room look nice so we can take better care of it, instead of doing all the other things you have to do.”  I think I love that little comment even more than the blue table.

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

Week In Review

Man, this week went fast and yet somehow Monday seems very long ago.

Monday my running buddy and I ran five miles!  This should not really be celebratory news, but I/we haven’t run that far since October.  We walked some of it, but it felt so good to break that five mile barrier again.  Monday was also grocery day again.  I need to get that bumped to another day of the week.  Although it is nice to get out Monday morning and have it done.  And Grace got her cast off Monday.  (Woot!!!)

I was also very grumpy on Monday.  I’m not sure why.  It could have been the go-go-go again all day.  It could have been early morning run.  Or it could have just been a grumpy day.

Tuesday and Wednesday we cleaned the house.  Wednesday we went to a choir picnic for Emma’s choir group.

Wednesday also brought some unexpected excitement to our lives.  I was sitting at my computer that morning, going through emails when Matt calls to tell me that a house we bought a while back, had remodeled, and had sold (with the closing being only days away), was on fire.  A neighbor had called him to let him know, as we had no other way of finding out.  Investigations that day led to the conclusion that the fire was set intentionally, but by whom, no one knows at this point.  I honestly spent Wednesday laughing about the whole thing.  It was just so ridiculous!  We’re not these crazy people who should have people trying to burn down properties we own.  Such a completely random and bizarre incident!  Thursday I was a little more disturbed by the whole thing as reality sank in a bit more.  We are praying that the arsonist is caught quickly and that God would be glorified in this.  Clearly, it wasn’t time for that house to sell yet!

Thursday morning we did some more garage saling.  I am a long-avowed non-garage saler, but a friend has been baiting me with her great finds for most of a year now, so we’ve given it a try the past two weeks.  The girls and I have had more fun together and we’ve found some great stuff.  Yesterday’s big score was this chair for $10.

I may or may not paint it.  I haven’t decided yet where it’s going to take up residence in the house, so we’ll see.  The other big find was this hideous thing:

Our rule the past two weeks has been “No Toys”.  I have made an exception both weeks, but they seem to understand that this is not an opportunity to collect more plastic junk.  That said, when we drove by the house with this thing in the front yard, Ellie gasped and asked eagerly to go look.  She was completely entranced.  When I told her she could buy it (with her own money), you’d swear she just won the lottery – skipping and bouncing down the sidewalk; all the way home saying “This is a dream come true!”.  They haven’t had any time yet to play with it, so I’m thinking I may have scored myself a very quiet Saturday morning tomorrow!  Definitely worth a few bucks of her money!

This weekend is ballet recital.  Quite possibly it will be the end of (or at least a long break in) an era for Grace.  We are praying about everyone’s activities for next year and what we should all be doing with our time, but we’re all pretty sure Grace is ready for a break from ballet.  This year was hard, mentally more than physically, and the schedule burned her (and us) out.  It will be sad to see her stop, but it’s too large of a commitment both financially and time-wise to drag her to something she doesn’t love.  Regardless of what next year holds, we are all looking forward to a break from regularly scheduled activities for a couple months!

I’m still trying to finish up Chandler and Ellie’s room.  Hopefully by the end of next week now I can post some pictures.  However, I did do a really fun project a couple of months ago that I never shared.  For years I’ve had French memo boards in our front hall for pictures and Christmas cards and such, but the boards were overflowing and also looking very tired so I tried to think of something different.  Enter, an old wood door from our basement:

It’s old and worn and completely imperfect.  It has old, rusty hardware on it, and for years I’ve been trying to figure out something fun to do with it.  Well, with the help of some nails, wire, and my husband, it has been transformed into my awesome picture hanging thing.  🙂

(My incredibly narrow and dark hallway makes it very difficult to get a good picture.)

Well, that’s our lives this week.  We’re loving summer already and the flexibility it provides.  May your weekend be wonderful and filled with time to enjoy your Creator.

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

When We Get What We Ask For…

Often it is simply the answers to our prayers that cause many of the difficulties in our Christian life.  We pray for patience, and our Father sends demanding people our way who test us to the limit, “because…suffering produces perseverance” (Romans 5:3).  We pray for a submissive spirit, and God sends suffering again, for we learn to be obedient in the same way Christ “learned obedience from what He suffered” (Hebrews 5:8).

We pray to be unselfish, and God gives us opportunities to sacrifice by placing other people’s needs first and by laying down our lives for other believers.  We pray for strength and humility, and “a messenger of Satan” (2 Corinthians 12:7) comes to torment us until we lie on the ground pleading for it to be withdrawn.

We pray to the Lord, as His apostles did, saying, “Increase our faith!” (Luke 17:5).  Then our money seems to take wings and fly away; our children become critically ill; an employee becomes careless, slow, and wasteful; or some other new trial comes upon us, requiring more faith than we have ever before experienced.  

We pray for a Christlike life that exhibits the humility of a lamb.  Then we are asked to perform some lowly task, or we are unjustly accused and given no opportunity to explain for “He was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and…did not open his mouth” (Isiah 53:7).

We pray for gentleness and quickly face a storm of temptation to be harsh and irritable.  We pray for quietness, and suddenly every nerve is stressed to its limit with tremendous tension so that we may learn that when He sends His peace, no one can disturb it.

We pray for love for others, and God sends unique suffering by sending people our way who are difficult to love and who say things that get on our nerves and tear at our heart.  He does this because “love is patient, love is kind…It is not rude,…it is not easily angered…It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.” (1 Corinthians 13: 4-5, 7-8)

Yes, we pray to be like Jesus, and God’s answer is: “I have tested you in the furnace of affliction” (Isaiah 48:10); “Will your courage endure or your hands be strong?” (Ezekiel 22:14); “Can you drink the cup?” (Matthew 20:22).

The way to peace and victory is to accept every circumstance and every trial as being straight from the hand of our loving Father; to live “with Him in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 2:6), above the clouds, in the very presence of His throne; and to look down from glory on our circumstances as being lovingly and divinely appointed.

~ Streams in the Desert, May 13

As I wrestle through another morning at home and the little ones continue to wear my rough spots smooth, I find myself resisting, and seriously considering running away.  At least for a little while.

And then I send them all to read and rest after lunch.  I hide away in the quiet writing spot I just created, Sonic ice water on the desk, and I begin to decompress.  I grab the Streams I had book marked from a couple of days ago and smile with God at how I needed this today.

These things I pray for…why am I surprised at how I must learn them?  And what more effective tools of God than these little people who are with me day in and day out?  And what will it take for the lessons to stick?

I don’t know when this heart will learn to respond first with grace and patience and gentleness.  I don’t know when that “one more thing” that wants to push me over the edge will instead push me to my knees.  I just don’t know when this heart will be right.  But I do know that He who started a work, will be faithful to complete it.  And I continue to trust that He will take these broken things that I offer up daily – my meager attempts to love and trust and give.  I trust that He will use them and make something beautiful out of the dust that I am and that He will be glorified in this home, in these lives.

For His Glory~

~ Sara

Week In Review

So we’ve been busy around here this week and last – painting and baking and enjoying less school.

Last Saturday we set up Chandler, Ellie, and Amania’s new-to-them beds.  The room already looks better with real beds, rather than just mattresses on frames.  Now we are working on “art”, bulletin boards, and remaining furniture.  I will post pictures when the room is finished, which will hopefully be this month.

Monday we grocery shopped for what seemed like the entire day.  I guess that’s what happens when you have a family of six and you skip a week.  Grace also got her massive cast cut down to a “short arm” cast which made her quite happy.  The whole darn thing comes off May 14.  I think I’m as excited as she is.

Tuesday we drove over to KC and visited Deanna Rose Farmstead.  Such a sweet little place, and free on weekdays.  The morning started out stormy and dark, but the rains stopped just as we got there and we enjoyed some beautiful sunshine the rest of the day.

Wednesday and Thursday we had a baking fest here.  Six loaves of bread.  Four batches of granola.  Oreo truffles.  Mini egg casseroles.  Couscous dip.  Banana pancakes.  No bake freezer granola bars.  Five ingredient granola bars.  And now I’m sufficiently burnt out on baking again.  🙂  Everything we made was pretty tasty.  The five ingredient bars need more peanut butter and/or honey as they don’t stick together at all.  And the mini egg casseroles were too much work for what is essentially one meal for my family.  I think next time I will just make a regular breakfast casserole and portion it out for the freezer.

Out of my own curiosity to see the difference it might make and to see how do-able it is on a long-term basis, I am trying to transition us to a “real foods” diet this summer.  I have a little more time to be in the kitchen and it’s so much easier to find good produce this time of year.  If it works well, we will hopefully be in enough of a routine with it by fall that it won’t all unravel when school starts back up.

I mentioned last week that I am not a perfectionist.  Neither am I a legalist (at least I try not to be).  And I’m definitely not one when it comes to food.  As soon as someone says I cannot have something I really enjoy, it suddenly becomes all I think about.  So, I find it easier to just enjoy certain foods from time to time and eat as nutritiously as I can the rest of the time.  I also find that the healthier I eat on a regular basis, the less I crave the unhealthy stuff.  That said, we will still eat out at Mexican restaurants and enjoy ice cream cones this summer.  I will just do my best to make sure the majority of our food is “real food”.

Today is the girls’ last day of Friday classes.  As much as we love love love Friday classes, it’s always nice when they are over for a bit.

I learned something about us this week.  I have come to the conclusion that we all do well with “flexible structure” to our day.  I have tried time and again to give us a real schedule, with times for this and that.  Every single time it fails and I end up incredibly frustrated.  What does work for us is a good To Do list with a start time and an end time.  For whatever reason, most of us here function really well with that type of structure and challenge, but crumble under set-in-stone times for everything.

I’m not quite sure what the weekend holds.  Perhaps some small painting projects.  We will definitely be celebrating Cinco de Mayo this weekend, what with our latent Mexican heritage and all.  (Surely we have some roots we don’t know about….how else can you explain our passion for chips and salsa?)  Regardless, I’m looking forward to relaxing and enjoying time with the fam.  Hope your weekend is great as well!

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

A Random Wednesday Post

True confessions time:  I am completely burned out on running.  Like I think I could go the rest of this year without running another step and be perfectly happy.  Now, I know that this is not true and I would feel rotten if I attempted this, but the notion strikes me regularly and most often at about 9:00 the night before I’m scheduled to run.  And at 5:00 a.m (or earlier) when my alarm goes off.

One of my running partners has been gracious enough to walk with me the past couple of times we’ve gotten together and it has been so refreshing!  My other running partner is training for a half marathon, so she needs to run, but it seems we’ve been having a hard time connecting to run lately.  Still, I know she’s ready for a break too after months of training through injuries.  I’m so proud of her for persevering!

In other news, Grace’s broken arm prompted me to follow through on an idea I had on my own and then saw again on Pinterest:

Source: imalazymom.com via Sara on Pinterest

Grace has long been our family “sock folder”.  Well, this became a little cumbersome when she spent more than a week not really able to use her right hand at all and with limited movement still.  So, in our laundry cabinet each of the girls now has a hook with her initial on it and a mesh laundry bag hangs from the hook.  They are responsible to put their socks and underwear in their bag.  When the bags start to look a little full, I throw them in with the laundry that day and everyone gets to fold their own socks and underwear.  Unfortunately for Grace, I hate folding socks, so she still gets to do Matt’s and mine.  But since her work load has been cut in half, she’s not complaining.  (In case you’re wondering, the bags run $.99 at WalMart.)

It has occurred to me that I haven’t posted about my 40 Bags in 40 Days experience since early in Lent.  Well, let’s see…I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity and the experience and I will do it again, but I confess it did not take long to cease being about making room for Jesus and become about checking another item off of my “to do” list.  Totally not the point, huh?  As we neared the end of Lent and I realized what had happened, I did a major slow down on my plan and refocused my heart on why I was doing this whole thing to begin with.

In the process of clearing out space, I did go through a lot of stuff and move it out of my house.  It also had a major impact on this adoption nesting thing I’ve got going on, so that + Pinterest have me in major “redecorate the house” mode.  Matt’s totally lovin’ this as our garage is now full of furniture to be painted and I’m regularly coming up with new things I’d like to do around the house.

I honestly need to do the 40 bags again this summer, as I only made it through about half of the house before I realized I was missing the point.  I like the idea of doing it for the 40 days leading up to my birthday, but that’s also the exact same time we are getting back to school.  So, maybe the first 40 days out of school?  Who knows…  🙂

In miscellaneous adoption news, IBESR in Haiti has recently closed to new dossiers in an attempt to “clear out current dossiers” by June 1.  Praise the Lord, we are one of those in there now, and who knows what will actually happen, but we are praying that ours would be processed in the next month and moved on.  How awesome would that be?!?!  When we entered IBESR in March, we were told 4 to 12 months.  To be out in less than two?  Only God!  Won’t you pray with us?  As we look at the things He is doing in our hearts and lives we can’t help but wonder if He’s not preparing us for her to come home soon.  We hope cautiously, as this road has been so treacherously long for so many.  But we see movement in Haitian adoptions, in the adoptions of friends adopting from the same orphanage, and we can’t help but hope with expectation.

That’s it for me today.  We finished up our school books today.  All except for Grace and her Sonlight, but that’s no big deal for me.   Thinking we may head over to KC and the Deanna Rose Farmstead tomorrow as a treat.  Woot!

For His Glory~

~ Sara

A Pinterest Scrabble Board

Oh, Pinterest….

I know Pinterest can be a time waster.  And can make us discontent.  And make us spend money or go trash picking for things we may not need.

But I have thoroughly enjoyed Pinterest as it has awakened a creative side in me that has been dormant for years and I’m having so much fun planning a summer full of projects for myself and the girls.  🙂

A few weeks ago I did a couple of projects.  The first one was this one:

We’ve had a lot of fun with our free-form Scrabble board.  Here’s how I made mine:

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I started with a large black frame that had been sitting in our basement for a few years. It was a cheaper one, with just a plastic sheet in place of the glass, but the frame was a decent wood construction.  It measures 24×36.  In the original board, Kim @ The Twice Remembered Cottage used sheet metal on plywood.  I planned to do this, but the hubs was a little busy at this time and I don’t know how to turn on the saw let alone actually cut something, so I improvised.  (And was pretty pleased with myself.  🙂 )  I found at WalMart a 24×36 magnetic white board.  I’m guessing if one was patient enough, you could find one of these inexpensively on Craig’s List or at a yard sale.  I was ready to do this thing, so I paid full price, by far my greatest expense at $19.99.  I also used some plain white computer paper (which I ended up not needing), a bottle of Elmer’s glue, a bottle of ModPodge, a hot glue gun, an old dictionary, and some old-looking parchment paper.

I laid the white board out on the counter and smeared it with Elmer’s glue.

I then covered the board with white printer paper.  This step ended up being superfluous, but for some reason I thought it would be necessary, so here it is.

Now, Kim @ The Twice Remembered Cottage tore pages out of a dictionary for her board.  I don’t know if it is the book lover in me or something else, but I just could not bring myself to tear pages out of a dictionary.  Nor could I bring myself to buy one just for the sake of tearing pages out of it.  So, we have a great old dictionary here and we happened to have some old-looking parchment paper and a copier.  I opted to copy the letter pages out of the dictionary and then tear the edges to give that old, rustic look.  I then mod-podged the pages onto the white board.  I began by taking some of the text-only pages and doing a first layer, then I went over it in a methodical but messy looking way with the letter pages, making sure some of my favorite entry illustrations showed on the finished board.

Grace being cheesy as I make my board followed by a blurry shot of me at work taken by one of the girls. 

Now somewhere in the midst of all this we had the exciting experience of our smoke detector going off as my dear husband was serving us by making dinner (steak in the oven – I don’t recommend it).  This is the smoke detector linked to our alarm system.  The one that calls the fire department if you don’t answer the alarm company’s call.  The call that went to a phone number we no longer have (even though I had requested it be changed) and then to Matt’s phone that was dead and then to my parents and our house sitter and possibly Matt’s parents too, though I don’t recall hearing from them in the midst of all this.  So we got to visit with our neighborhood firemen.  Unfortunately (or fortunately) it wasn’t my brother’s crew and they insisted on coming in and checking things out.  Needless to say, I probably wasn’t as gracious and polite as I should have been and may have been a little jittery for the rest of the evening.

Nonetheless, I persevered and finished my board!

And now it hangs near my desk.  I attached the white board to the frame with hot glue and let it dry.  I used the Scrabble tiles from our personal game and a friend gave me an extra game that they had laying around.  I need to get one more set of Scrabble tiles, but it’s plenty of fun with two sets.  I bought a lot (as in a literal “lot”, not just “many”) of super-strong “earth” magnets on eBay.  This was my second significant expense, though I don’t recall just how much it ended up being, but it was less than the cost of the white board and I have magnets to spare.  I attached the magnets with a strong craft glue.

I am not a perfectionist by any stretch of the imagination.  There are some bubbles and imperfections in my board.  I should have taken more time applying the ModPodge to my dictionary pages, but I was too busy trying to calm down after our visit with the fire department.  That, and I’m not a perfectionist.  😉 The nice thing about having copied the dictionary pages is that if the bubbles ever bother me enough, I can easily recreate the board.  No one here seems to mind the imperfections and the board makes me smile pretty much every time I see it.

For His Glory ~

~ Sara

Indescribable Grace

Sometimes an old acquaintance posts something to Facebook that makes you stop and think:

I have no idea if she was talking about me or not.  Hopefully I wasn’t so bad to actually qualify as a “godless whore”, but you never know.  I was definitely a bit of a mess.  Either way, it got me thinking about so many things.  Like how the choices you make and the reputation you earn can follow you the rest of your life.  And also how amazing it is that a perfect and holy God can overlook it all.

I’ve battled against the Enemy’s lies this year and I finally feel myself becoming stronger again.  God’s truth is once again drowning out the sound of defeat and discouragement and I feel myself rising again to do battle against the Prince of Lies. These words of healing played through SUV speakers last week….

There’s a girl in the corner
With tear stains on her eyes
From the places she’s wandered
And the shame she can’t hide

She says, “How did I get here?
I’m not who I once was.
And I’m crippled by the fear
That I’ve fallen too far to love”

But don’t you know who you are, 
What’s been done for you?
Yeah don’t you know who you are?

You are more than the choices that you’ve made, 
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, 
You are more than the problems you create, 
You’ve been remade. 

Well she tries to believe it
That she’s been given new life
But she can’t shake the feeling
That it’s not true tonight

She knows all the answers
And she’s rehearsed all the lines
And so she’ll try to do better
But then she’s too weak to try

But don’t you know who you are?

You are more than the choices that you’ve made, 

You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, 
You are more than the problems you create, 
You’ve been remade. 

You are more than the choices that you’ve made, 
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, 
You are more than the problems you create, 
You’ve been remade. 

‘Cause this is not about what you’ve done, 
But what’s been done for you.
This is not about where you’ve been, 
But where your brokenness brings you to

This is not about what you feel, 
But what He felt to forgive you, 
And what He felt to make you loved. 

You are more than the choices that you’ve made, 
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, 
You are more than the problems you create, 
You’ve been remade. 

You are more than the choices that you’ve made, 
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes, 
You are more than the problems you create, 
You’ve been remade. 

You’ve been remade
You’ve been remade. 
You’ve been remade.
You’ve been remade.

(You are More by Tenth Avenue North)

[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/t/tenth-avenue-north-lyrics/you-are-more-lyrics.html ]

And those lies that my sins are bigger than my Savior have haunted me in my past and they’ve haunted me this year.  The lie that all of my weaknesses and inadequacies, my struggles and my stumblings with these children, this husband, this life, that He’s not big enough to overcome it – all a lie from the one who seeks to devour and destroy.

A dear friend sends this quote yesterday from The Mother Letters:

It is a complete matter of trust that He will give our children what they need despite our shortcomings. ~ Rachel McAdams

And last night as we sat in worship we sang the lyrics,

Sing to Jesus
Lord of our shame
Lord of our sinful hearts
He is our great Redeemer
Sing to Jesus
Honor His name
Sing of His faithfulness
Pouring His life out unto death

Come, you weary
And He will give you rest
Come you who mourn
Lay on His breast

(Sing to Jesus by Fernando Ortega)

Oh the mighty Savior that He would bear our sins and shame and welcome us with open arms, a soft place to fall.  And that He would cover over my weaknesses and fill in the gaps with His strength and healing.

So as I come back to the Facebook post that prompted this spilling of words, two things come to mind.  First, for anyone young who happens to be reading this – what you do now matters.  Who you are now matters.  In a world of social networking and digital never-to-be-deleted connectedness, your choices now matter a lot.  But the second point, and this is for the young person and everyone else – this God, my God, He’s big enough to cover it with His grace.  Friends from fifteen years ago may not offer fresh-start grace, but Jesus does.

And for that grace, the thanksgiving never ends.

1714.  four days, five doctor’s offices

1715.  six and a half hours in outpatient care

1716.  a mended arm

1717.  a red cast

1718.  my girl feeling so much better

1719.  serving the hungry with my Chandler, my servant-child

1720.  going to the airport to welcome home the Jayhawks

1721.  making a memory with my girls

1722.  feeling the weight lift

1723.  James MacDonald study

1724.  bearing up

1725.  finding His blessings

1726.  the annual candy toss

1727.  Easter celebrations

1728.  a Texas trip with my Emma

1729.  evening with good friends from Matt’s past

1730.  audiobook on the iPod

1731.  discovering the joy of listening to a book

1732.  last days of school – the end is near!

1733.  pinpointing some of my struggles

1734.  praying through changes

1735.  a new office, a new chapter in our lives

1736.  home school conference, lunch, and shopping with my favorite

1737.  a two hour nap

1738.  quiet girls

1739.  Overflow worship

1740.  relentless, overwhelming grace

All for His glory ~

~ Sara